A Special Christmas 2010 Blog: The Case for Santa...

You know, there's been a "debate" going back and forth for several years now as to whether it's a good thing or a bad thing to let your children believe in Santa Claus. Don't believe me? Just take a quick glance through this google search:

Should Kids Believe in Santa?

What stuns me the most about this is that I know "devout" Christians who absolutely refuse to let their child believe in Santa. Wow.

So, I'm going to keep this brief , but I'm going to present what I feel is a pretty clear-cut case in defense of Santa.

1. Children have a sense of wonder about the world that we, as adults, almost without fail, lose as we grow up. It's truly sad when you stop to think about it. Very few things "take our breath away" as adults. While as children, every new thing they come across fills them with wonder! Why, as a society, are we increasingly taking our children's childhood away from them? I was at a store the other day looking over new cell phones (not that I wanted to buy one, I'm a geek...I just like looking at them!) and a woman was standing there debating with a clerk what phone and plan she should buy for her seven year old daughter! Really? While I could go on forever about why no seven year old child "needs" a cell phone, the most pressing argument against it, in my opinion is this: let them be a kid! All too soon they will be an adult who on many many many occasions will wish they could just pitch that stupid thing into a river! Seven year old kids aren't supposed to be talking on cell phones...they're supposed to be playing with dolls, or tonka trucks, or sledding down a steep hill, giggling so hard they can't catch their breath by the time they reach bottom. Just generally being a kid and doing kid things! (Side note: I became so infuriated standing there listening to that woman debate what her 7-year old child "needed" in a cell phone that I had to walk away before I lit into her...)
2. A child's world is rife with fantasy anyway. Imaginary friends. Fairy tales. You name it, kids live and love fantasy. It is perfectly normal, and perfectly healthy for children to fantasize. Why deny them Santa Claus? He teaches the single most important quality of Human Kind: The concept of giving and caring for others. It seems that one of the basic "reasons" for parents not allowing children to believe in Santa is that as a parent, you have to "lie to your children." Are you kidding me? Really? This is such a specious argument, in my opinion. When the child gets old enough to start being skeptical that there is a "real" Santa, they are maturing enough to understand that, while Santa is based on a real person, the concept of Santa...that we should be caring and giving individuals...that those who do good things are rewarded in return...is what "believing" in Santa is all about. Will they be disappointed that there's no "real" Santa? Probably. But guess what...it's another lesson that is important for every child to learn as they begin to mature: life has its disappointments! 
3. Santa is the MAN. 'Nuff said!

So parents, on this Christmas Day, 2010, I encourage you...I implore you...do not deny your child the sense of wonder, the feeling of belonging to a Human Race that cares for each other, the sheer joy of believing that yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus!

May your life be filled with "Santa Claus Moments."

The Alleged "War on Christmas"

Much is made around this time of year about the "War on Christmas." This supposed "war" has been taking place for many years now. It started many years ago with "the enemy" using the abbreviation of "X-mas" in an effort to "Take Christ out of Christmas." I'm not going to repeat work that's already been done for me...go read this link that pretty much completely debunks that "battle":

"X-mas" Abbreviation myth debunked

The next great "battle" waged against X-mas was the "forcing people to say "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas". Again, I will not re-invent the wheel....

Home Depot "bans" the word Christmas from its website...debunked.
Target "bans" use of word "Christmas"...debunked!

A recent iteration of this particular "battle" I will return to in great detail later in this post.

Let's turn to the latest "battle" in the "War on Christmas." Obstructionist members of Congress are now bemoaning that having to actually do some sort of work in this last two weeks before Christmas is somehow sacrilegious and/or an affront to the "most holy" of Christian Holidays. My first thought when I heard this was "wow, do these idiots not smell the stench of the crap that's falling out of their mouths??"

But I can't just leave it at that, can I? Of course not! There's just way too much hypocrisy to shove back down their throats. So let's make a detailed list of just how hypocritical such a statement is:

1. And I put this as number 1 for a reason, though the rest of the list will be somewhat random in order: Dear Congress: Are you aware that the vast majority of working people in this country have to work right up until Friday, December 24th, and will return to work on Monday, December 27th, if not sooner? And there are even people who have to work on the actual day of Christmas itself? If their jobs are that important, what in God's name makes you think yours isn't??? And while you're at it, go ahead and whine to the tens of thousands of men and women in our armed forces who will be thousands of miles away from their loved ones on Christmas...and working to boot! Go ahead...I DARE YOU! And let's not forget about the 10% of this country's population who wish they had a job that forced them to work right up to Christmas!
2. "We can't run a piece of legislation with such importance to National Security (START Treaty) through Congress in a few days without full deliberations." Uhm...yeah...The Prez signed that treaty in June. You've had six months to review it, send your questions to the White House, and have every one of them answered.
3. "We can't pass a Trillion-dollar Omnibus bill filled with Pork in a few days time without full deliberations." Oh...you mean that Omnibus bill that was a bi-partisan effort and has a really large chunk of Pork requested by you in it??
4. Where was your concern for working up until Christmas over the past year while you were using every foot-dragging tactic you could dream up to keep from having to do any work, or take any responsibility, for doing the job you were elected to do?
5. A quick glance at this Timeline search on Google shows that it is not unusual for Congress to work up until the 22nd or 23rd of December: Congressional Christmas Adjournment Timeline Search. *checks calendar* Oh...yeah...today's the 17th!!!!!

Okay, I think that's enough rubbing of their noses in the crap falling out of their mouths. Now let's turn to what's really got under my skin recently about the so-called "War on Christmas." And I will say up-front it will probably make people who have "said" these words grind their teeth...and perhaps never speak to me again. I'm ok with that.

Anyone who uses FaceBook on a regular (or even semi-regular) basis knows that it's really popular to post cut-and-paste status messages. While I generally hold a dim view of such status messages (see my previous post A Nation of Lemmings), I am particularly irked by this one, for different reasons:

We Can't say MERRY CHRISTMAS anymore, We Now Say HAPPY HOLIDAYS ! We Can't call it a CHRISTMAS TREE, We Now Call It a HOLIDAY TREE, Because it might offend someone! They call it CUSTOMS, We Call it TRADITIONS. This is OUR COUNTRY! If U Wanna Live & Work here have Some RESPECT! If U Don't like it, TOO BAD! GO HOME! If you agree with this, PLEASE post as your status. OH, By the way.☆※◦MERRY CHRISTMAS!!


First of all...yes you CAN. You can say "Merry Christmas." You can call it a "Christmas Tree. You see, we have this thing in this country called the First Amendment that gives you the right to say just about anything you want to say. Including "Merry Christmas." So the basic premise of this statement is just patently false.


Secondly, the back half of this post should completely offend your sensibilities as an American. I am going to completely skip the whole customs vs. traditions statement as it makes no damn sense whatsoever!  I am, however,  going to address every statement of the back half of this blurb, one by one.

1. "This is OUR COUNTRY!" Yes...it is. OUR country. Christians, Jews, Buddhists, Muslims, Hindus, etc, etc, etc. This country has spent well over 200 years growing as a Melting Pot of people of all faiths, nationalities, and races from all over the world. Every "faction" of people who have come to this country has had influence on what we have become. For a Christian to claim it as "our country" is so offensive to me that I literally have to rinse the bad taste of it out of my mouth. Oh...and btw...I was born, raised, and still consider myself...a Christian!
2. "If you wanna live & work here have some RESPECT". For what? Someone who insists that I kowtow to the concept of a country that they "OWN"???
3. "If you don't like it, TOO BAD! GO HOME!" Really? You're telling all the non-Christians who live in this country to "go home"? Even though their families...just like yours...may have been here for 3, 4 and 5 generations? This IS their home...just as much as it is yours!
4. "If you agree with this (blah blah blah)": after reading points 1, 2, and 3...Congratulations! You're a self-righteous, sanctimonious, hypocritical...LEMMING!!!

Lastly, may I point out my reason for saying "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas"? It's simple. There are multiple religions who have holy celebrations during the month of December. Just like most of you, I am sure, I have friends of many different beliefs. Christians: yes. Hindus: yes. Muslims: yes. Buddhists: yes. Sikhs: yes. Jews: yes. To me, it's not a matter of "offending" them by saying "Merry Christmas." It's a matter of wanting to include them, no matter what their particular belief may be, in the wonderful feeling that the celebration of one's beliefs can bring...by saying "Happy Holidays."

Merry Christmas,
Kirk

A Nation of Lemmings

When exactly did this happen to us?
When did we go from a nation of free-thinkers?
A Land of Healthy Skeptics?
To the Land of Lemmings...willing to follow anyone straight off a cliff at the drop of a hat?
Don't believe me? Take a look at the atmosphere in this country over the last several months. People willing to believe in "death panels" just because some schmuck on TV told them it was true. (Well it was on TV/the Internet/Radio so it MUST be true, right???) That our President isn't a U.S. citizen. And even looking past the "bigger issues" down to the little ones. Someone explain to me why people will forward every bogus "virus alert" when the hoaxers have basically been using the same lame boilerplate template for their "warning" for going on 20 years now? And all it takes is a 2-second search on snopes to debunk it? People posting and reposting cut/paste status messages on FB just because "I saw everyone else posting it." I know it sounds trite and ridiculous but does anyone else out there remember what our Moms used to tell us when we tried to use the excuse "well the other kids did/are doing it too" ? The standard "Mom" answer from "The Book of Mom-isms": "Well if they all went and jumped off a bridge would you do it too?"

When did we become a nation of people willing to jump off bridges (against our Mom's better advice!) just because "everyone else is doing it too." ?

Not only does it boggle my mind that what was once a great nation of thinkers has been reduced to a bunch of blathering cut/paste, e-mail forwarding loons who are willing to swallow what any nutbag who comes along tries to shove down their throat...it embarrasses me as an American. We will not...cannot continue along this path and expect to solve our problems. Until we wake up and understand that everyone who would "speak to us" through whatever medium, be it TV, internet, radio, newspaper or magazine has their own agenda and are willing to obfuscate the truth in order to convince us over to their agenda, we will continue to waste time on every stupid non-issue they can dream up to keep us from addressing the real issues...the urgent and dire and pressing issues of our nation and people. The Nation of Lemmings comes closer and closer to the precipice every day...and only we as individuals can prevent our going over it in a mass suicide. Remember individualism? That great personality trait that this country was founded and built upon?

So here's my challenge to you: resist the urge! Before you take any actions, no matter how trivial they may seem, ask yourself: Am I doing this because it is what I want to do, or am I just being a lemming and "following along" because "everybody's doing it?" Should I take what this person says at face value? Or should I spend 10 minutes doing the research required to form my own opinion before just re-spouting whatever it is they may be saying? Can I take two seconds to research that virus warning on snopes or should I just automatically forward it to my 4 thousand best friends because I'd rather be 'safe than sorry'? Do I love my son/daughter/mother/father/spouse/cousin/dog/cat/turtle enough to actually take the few seconds it takes to put that love into my own words, rather than copy/pasting some other lemming's status?

Every time you allow someone else to do your thinking for you or tell you how you "should" think.....you give up a small piece of yourself...your freedom...your individuality. Don't let that happen. Don't be the lemming over the cliff.

Music: Shinedown live "Acoustic"

Well last night I was lucky enough to win tickets from 105.7 The Point to see "Shinedown" live at the Pageant. (Thanks!)
Two things: How does taking your electric rock bass and setting it on a stand so that you play it like some sort of "pretend" upright bass make this an "acoustic" show? I'm thinkin' if you're doing an acoustic show, you really have no need of a 64-channel mixer, either...but they sure had one! Anyway....that's just a side-rant.

What I'd really like to talk about is the lead singer having to "explain" every song to the audience.

Listen, dood...no one really cares what your personal reasons are for writing the song. Especially when it takes you 5 minutes to "explain" a song that takes FOUR to play!

They care why it connects to them! And here's the real kicker, bud...the listener may connect to your song for a completely unrelated reason than your original reason for writing the song. That is the beauty of music! And you know what else? Telling them your reason may just totally ruin the meaning of the song (and the song itself) for the listener.

So...if you are so in love with the sound of your own speaking voice and your story-telling abilities that you  want to "tell your stories" ....book a lecture tour. In the meantime, while on a concert tour, just stfu and sing your songs....that is why people come to see you in concert.

Why Every Single American Should be in favor of Health Care Reform

Right. I know. It's been beat to death.  The "Pros" say we need to do something to care for the millions of uninsured. The "Cons" say "not out of my pocket." And never the twain shall meet, no? What I'm about to tell you will probably boggle your mind for a moment, until you stop and say to yourself "oh...my...GOD!" Screw "public options"...screw "single payer"...screw "compassion for your fellow man". There is one simple fact that both sides (incredulously, in my opinion, when it comes to the "Pro" side) seem to completely ignore...and it is the single, sole reason why every American should stand up and demand that our so-called "Health Care System" be reformed. And that reason is this:

You are paying for it anyway!


How this irrefutable, undeniable fact has been largely left out of this entire debate just defies all logic of any sort. And to top it off, not only are you paying for it...you are paying for it in a way that is completely and totally unaccountable. The hospitals, the doctors, the big pharmacy companies...every sector of the Health Care Industry tells you "well the reason your bill is so high is because others aren't paying their bills, so we have to recoup our costs somehow." Hell the government forces (thankfully) hospitals to care for all patients, regardless of their ability to pay.

So who gets stuck with that unpaid "bill", compadre? YOU DO! Except here's the deal: You have no way of knowing if these people are being truthful with you about how much they actually "lose" to non-paying patients, and in turn pad onto your bill in order "make up" for said non-payment. Is it 1000 dollars they need to add to your bill? Or 10,000? Or 100,000? or TEN CENTS??? Guess what my friends...they're going to bid HIGH...bilking every possible dime they can out of you, because you don't have a freakin' clue what their true costs are, do you? Of course not. And in recent decades, the American Mantra has become "screw unto others before they screw unto you."

So, true healthcare reform would bring with it (hopefully) a full accounting of what costs are incurred by any health care provider when a customer does not pay their bill. And this in turn would, almost without a shadow of a doubt, drive prices down. Because now they can't charge you 30 dollars for a baby aspirin in the hospital when the accountants show that they only need to charge you 2. And guess what? When the prices are driven down, more and more people are capable of actually paying their bills, so the Providers incur less and less loss due to non-payment. Which in turn does what? Drive the cost down even more. Pretty soon, you've got prices to the point where even the guy pan-handling on the street can afford to go to a doctor and pay CASH to have a yearly check-up. Oh...my...GOODNESS...I've just put the insurance industry out of business!

And lest you think what I'm talking about is "not possible"...let me relate a true story to you. I traveled to India on business a few years back. Speaking of back, I threw the hell out of mine while I was there. I called the hotel doctor and he paid a visit to my room, referring me to a local doctor who specialized in back problems. That doctor charged me the equivalent of 4 dollars US per office visit. (And lest you think he was an "inferior" doctor, his diploma was hanging on the wall of his office. Cambridge University. With Honors.) He sent me to get an MRI done on my back. Total cost: 100 U.S. dollars. And I was given a CD with the MRI on it. It wasn't transferred to the doctor...it was handed...to me...my property. Now, I'm sure you're thinking 4 dollars and 100 dollars is a lot of money to an Indian. You're right. But it's not so out of reach for the average Indian that the doctor's office wasn't packed with patients every time I went there, and that there weren't several Indians at the MRI clinic. And trust me...I watched...somewhat fascinated...as virtually 99% of the patients paid cash for their medical care. To shorten my story somewhat, I made at least 1/2 a dozen visits to the doctor, had 4 weeks of physical therapy, and an MRI, for a total cost of right at 300 US dollars. Oh and the hotel doctor checked on me several times. I never did see a charge for it on  my hotel bill.

Shortly thereafter I returned to the US and went to my doctor to continue my recovery. He refused to accept the CD of my MRI in India, stating that my insurance company would not accept it for "diagnostic purposes." So I had to go to a local MRI clinic to have another one taken. To the tune of nearly 3000 US dollars. Oh and by the way...yes...I did notice. The MRI machine in India and in the US were the exact same make/model.

So, when you tell me that it's "not possible" for the "greatest nation on earth"  to have a health care system where everyone can afford to pay cash on the spot for their healthcare,  I will tell you that I would be remiss in my duty as a human being if I did not laugh in your face.

In Summary:
Dear "Cons": You're paying for "them" anyway. I would think your penny-pinching "compassionate" selves would at least want a full accounting of what it's costing you. Engage your brain and demand Health Care Reform now. It's your duty. To yourself.

Tips for Driving Safely on Our Interstate Highway System

Having spent some 30-odd years now driving on various parts of our Interstate Highway System, I think I can call myself somewhat of an "expert" at what it takes to safely travel on them. Should you doubt my veracity, let me give you an example: Once, driving from Chicago to St. Louis for the Holidays, I went from a completely dry roadway to a snow-packed one in a matter of an instant. I mean it looked like Mother Nature had painted a line across the highway and said "here be DRY....here be SNOW!" I'd never seen anything like it before or since. It was so bad that cars ahead of me were literally landing on top of each other as they slid into the ditches on either side of the road. I was driving a Honda Civic 3-door with my then wife in the passenger seat. She commenced to screaming and panicking and grabbing at my leg like that was going to help anything. I slid seemingly helplessly around on the highway, doing at least 1 complete 360, before my speed was reduced enough for me to regain full traction on the snow-packed highway and continue along my way. I made it...when literally dozens of others hadn't. So with that pre(r)amble in mind...please heed my following tips for safe highway driving.

1. First order of business (best done as you are going up that nice curly-cue entrance ramp) is to fire up your cell phone. Call anybody, doesn't matter. Pranking is particularly fun as you are hurtling down the highway at 70 miles per hour! Optimal use of the phone is to hold it in your left hand, and lean against your window, so that it in effect turns itself into a "horse blinder" forcing you to completely forget that there is anything even resembling a universe to your left side.
2. Mirrors are things to be mistrusted. (There's a reason they put that sticker "Objects in your mirror are closer than they appear"!) You are safest not to bother using them.
3. When entering the highway via the entrance ramp, no matter how long a stretch you have to get your speed up, you must never...ever merge into the actual highway lane doing more than 45 miles an hour. Going any faster completely scares every other driver already on the highway and you never know what may happen. Also, in the process, it is best if you actually time it so that you will have to cut off a car at the very last second as you merge (slowly!) onto the highway. They're probably going too fast anyway, so you are doing them a favor. You might even be saving their lives by forcing them to slow down.
4. Never. I mean NEVER use your turn signal for any reason while travelling our fabulous highway system. If you should accidentally turn on your blinker out of some odd habit you may have acquired over the years, you must leave it on for a minimum of 5 miles, and change lanes (preferably in the opposite direction of the way your blinker is blinking) at least once...hopefully more if there are enough lanes to allow. (Alternate: if you run out of opposite lanes, start pulling onto the shoulder as if you are having car troubles, slow way down, and then after turning your blinker off, slide slowly back into traffic. This is particularly effective if you do so in the left lane, as most cars in this lane are travelling at a slower pace anyway.)
5. Whenever you see at least two car lengths in between cars in the next lane...you are required by law to dive into it, in order to make more efficient use of space on the roadway. The best use of this tip occurs when you stomp on your gas and turn sharply in between the two...cutting off the trailing car...run right up to the tailpipe of the leading car...and then slam on your brakes to prevent hitting said leading car. I mean truly, it is such a horrible waste of space to have that much room between two cars, don't you think?
6. Last, but certainly not least, there are only 2 proper ways to exit the highway

• Option 1: stay in the left lane until the last possible second, and then stomp on your gas to dive across all available lanes into the exit ramp just before it's too late.
• Option 2: get in the right-hand lane at least 5 miles before the exit, and begin slowing down progressively until you are doing 25 by the time you actually hit the exit.

There you have it...Kirk's tips for safely traversing our Interstate Highway System.

Oh yeah...I almost forgot...it is now safe to hang up your cell phone.

Welcome...

to "The Blog That Shall Remain Nameless".

Why? Because I feel titling the blog may impose (self) editorial limits that I do not wish to impose upon myself.

I'm not going to bore you with what I "plan" to talk about. Because I have a lot of things I would like to get around to discussing, but I'm not sure I'll ever get around to them all. So I'll just present you with my tagline, as I think it pretty well covers my philosophy for this blog:

"Separating the Bull from the Crap...Putting the Sense back in the Common."